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My Pro-Choice Rights and My Pro-Life Husband

March 2nd, 2009

Today we have a guest post from Mackenzie Clark Howard, an editor in Nashville, Tennessee. Her website is coming soon.

I’ve always been pro-life, and I couldn’t pretend to be otherwise. Since I’ve been a young teenager, I’ve been disturbed that someone has the legal right, the choice, if you will, to kill their child. However, in my adult married life, I’ve found something else much more disturbing.

You see, as far as I understand, it’s not just someone who has the legal choice. It is women. I look at my husband, a teacher, who loves kids, and I wonder about his rights. Given, he’s a bit gun-shy about plunging into the world of parenthood, but he looks forward to some day in the future when we have our first child. We were married when we were pretty young by today’s standards, so we’ve always been careful planners. (Note to the world: pregnancy is in fact preventable.) His gun-shyness aside, had we had a happy accident, for my husband, abortion would have never been an option. During such what if discussions about how our life might change, my husband has stated that we’d scale back and make it work just fine. He could even live without his high-def satellite TV if he had to—he really is a gem.

I’m happy to be married to such a man, and I too, would have never considered abortion as an option. However, it’s is my legal right to do so, against my husband’s wishes. Last I checked, men are equally involved in the creation and ownership of children . . . so why is abortion the woman’s choice?

Now, I realize there are a lot of irresponsible men in this world who are, to say the least, a disgrace to the word “Father,” but even still, how can our legal system cater to such a one-sided law? I could technically abort my child without my husband ever knowing he had one—where is the justice in that?
I understand that a situation where a man wants the child and a woman does not is probably not the most common scenario. However, it’s still very plausible, and our laws should not exclude a man’s right to his children. Would not the same man be held accountable in a court of law to pay child support for his children in a divorce settlement?

Let’s talk about a woman’s real right to choose. Women have the choice to make good decisions for their lives and their bodies. We have the obligation and the responsibility to take control of our health and our futures. My life and my body have reaped the benefits of such choices. As a single woman, the choice to remain abstinent has given me priceless physical and emotional health benefits. As a married woman, I’ve been able to successfully use several methods of birth control. A little education and preparation go a long way.

Unfortunately, education and preparation don’t seem to be at the forefront of our leaders’ minds. Now with the Freedom of Choice Act on the table, the government is on the verge of putting more one-sided, ignorant laws into place. Through this brilliant piece of legislation women could potentially put their husbands’ children through a tortuous death via partial-birth-abortion, and minors can do the same without their parents’ awareness. Can a minor get their wisdom teeth out without parental awareness? Really? Is this a good idea? How is this promoting personal or social responsibility in any way?

Our judicial system needs to take a better look at how they’re doling out rights. I can’t legally drive under the influence, get better tax rebates, or rob a 7-Eleven because I have ovaries, so please remind me why I can kill my husband’s child?

Author: Derek Clark Categories: Abortion Tags:
  1. March 2nd, 2009 at 21:07 | #1

    Yes, there is clearly a double standard in play - one which people on either side of the debate never seem to have an answer for. It’s absurd for the woman to have all of the decision making ability and for the man to have to shoulder a financial burden. Whether abortion is right or wrong if it isn’t the man’s *choice* he shouldn’t have to pay for it.

  2. March 2nd, 2009 at 21:51 | #2

    There is also a huge double standard when it is double murder if someone kills a pregnant woman but that woman can her baby if she wants to. Why is it murder for someone else to kill her unborn baby?

  3. Dave
    April 27th, 2009 at 20:03 | #3

    Well, it happened to me. My wife aborted my first child without my consent. It still haunts me today and I think about that child all the time. After the abortion, she became pregnant about a year later. She was going to abort the second baby too. I told her I would seek and get a court injuction to try to stop her. That convinced her to carry my now beautiful 12 year old daughter whom i love dearly. However, the damage was done over the years and told my soon to be ex-wife that I wanted a divorce and my daughter and we would move out. My wife then accused me of a sex crime against herself. The Jury belived me and I am free. However, she used the system to falsly accuse me and this has prevented me from having a relationship with my daughter. I hope someday husbands have a right to prevent abortions from happening. Their should be a law against it.

  4. December 31st, 2010 at 03:40 | #4

    I really salute your thinking.Man should also have right to decide to have baby it should not be individual decision of woman